How do you know when to commit?

[csite]

if you know you may lose someone you met who you think is special by not acting, does that mean it's the right time to commit? i mean go for a khastegari, even though you don't feel quite ready to get married or engaged...

[purrsian_cat]

why would you think you may lose them?

[zubin]

if you know you may lose someone you met who you think is special by not acting, does that mean it's the right time to commit? i mean go for a khastegari, even though you don't feel quite ready to get married or engaged...

in my opinion special is not enough for marriage but for engagement without a 100% marriage committment, why not. then you can test things out to see if the next step is also a good idea.

[csite]

why would you think you may lose them?

purely family pressure on her side to find her a suitable guy!!

[csite]

in my opinion special is not enough for marriage but for engagement without a 100% marriage committment, why not. then you can test things out to see if the next step is also a good idea.

tbh i really can't see the diffrence between the two! to me engagement requires more commitment than marriage except that she won't be nagging you for kids...

[Dokhtare_Malous]

if you know you may lose someone you met who you think is special by not acting, does that mean it's the right time to commit? i mean go for a khastegari, even though you don't feel quite ready to get married or engaged...

well if u really love someone and vaghty ke bekhateresh ull do anything bayad pa pish bezari so at least be engaged and then if u were ready u can get married i hope you know wat i mean. chon ye dokhtar nemitoone chand saal az omresho bezare paye kasi ke oon pesar pa pish nazare beharhal its every girls wish to get engaged or marry and they cant waste their time on someone ke nakhad pa pish bezare and ofcourse u will lose her if u dont do anything just bcuz ur saying im not ready then if ur not ready dont ever go in a relationship with someone bcuz that girl also wants to make a family as well and has lots of hopes for her future life. u cant be BF GF for the rest of ur life bare ayande fekr kon ke u will spend ur life with someone that you really love. I hope wat i said its helpful and these were all my opinion soo good luck

[truthteller]

Simple answer

you know when to commit, when you see yourself in another person, and that is called love - otherwise, don't commit unless you are desperate (as most people are) and lonely, but that kind of commitment will eventually lead either to accepted boredom or divorce

[Dokhtar Bandari]

if you know you may lose someone you met who you think is special by not acting, does that mean it's the right time to commit? i mean go for a khastegari, even though you don't feel quite ready to get married or engaged...

Thinking that you may lose someone comes from an ego based desire. When you meet the right person and you can be yourself without judgment then the right thing will happen. It takes 2 to tango and one has to be incredibly stupid not to recognize signs and pointers.

Commitment requires self confidence in financial, mental and emotional issues and has nothing to do with love.

go get'm champ.

[truthteller]

I always see $$ signs flashing in Iranian womens' eyes Why is that so ?

Commitment requires self confidence in financial, mental and emotional issues and has nothing to do with love.

[zubin]

tbh i really can't see the diffrence between the two! to me engagement requires more commitment than marriage except that she won't be nagging you for kids...

with engagement, there is no need to divorce to break up, and there is nothing morally wrong with breaking up.

if you are married, it is harder to break up, ie via divorce

therefore, you can always get engaged to test things out.

[Dokhtar Bandari]

I always see $$ signs flashing in Iranian womens' eyes Why is that so ?

chera Ko*o o sher migee bacheh...that is a solid advice ask any prudent person. And $$ signes don'e flash in their eyes, they know the value of their time, efforts and love...nothing wrong with that. You can easily fall in love with a poor man as you can with a rich man...so please gooz va shaghegeh ra ba ham eshteba nakoneed..

[truthteller]

Bache oone ke $$ eyes dare

chera Ko*o o sher migee bacheh...

[csite]

Well there's quite a long story to this, but thanks for wise words.

[purrsian_cat]

Thinking that you may lose someone comes from an ego based desire. When you meet the right person and you can be yourself without judgment then the right thing will happen. It takes 2 to tango and one has to be incredibly stupid not to recognize signs and pointers.

Commitment requires self confidence in financial, mental and emotional issues and has nothing to do with love.

very very true

[csite]

very very true

that's not entirely true! you have to think of the 3rd dimension with some persian girls, their family!

Since my own sister is going through the same phase (having khastagar's) i know it's very difficult to please a family and being yourself just isn't good enough for 90% + of persian families.. just like i wouldn't want anything other than complete perfection for my own sister!

Thanks for the good advice anyways guys.