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**A Child's Dream**
Love.
You do not choose the one you love.
You can't select based on a criteria you dream up.
I thought I could find someone to fit that mold, and I thought that person would suit me perfectly.
I was wrong. In fact, that is the least likely guy to get my heart. It always has been.
Take my first love for example...he was a different race and religeon. I fell in love with the person he was and the way he made me feel. We had fun together.
Years passed, we began to argue and then it was over. Nothing major ever took place to break us up, it was just a gradual desintegration that took place over us growing up and growing apart. Another high school sweetheart sob story.
My second love was a college romance. He had a mental illness that drew us apart. He had a low self esteem and was never happy. He filled my world with romance, and swept me off my feet with his charm but inside him he was fighting a war that I could not help him win.
He gave up on us. He came up with an excuse to leave, which is what he needed the whole time. He could not handle our relationship.
I recently met someone, at a bar. The single place I swore I would never "take home" anyone from. He smokes, a habit I can't stand. He has a child.
Something that pains me deep inside because I know if we were to be together that our children would never equal the pleasure one has from their first born.
He has a ton of tattoos which are a turn off to me, he has no education which annoys me, he has a messed up family which hurts me, and yet, I feel something for him.
Why? He does not fit my mold!!! My prince charming has an education, has no baggage, and has never lived a real and honest life. The truth is that the picture I had of my prince does not exist!!!!
It is unrealistic to think that someone could live up to those standards in this day in age. If he does exist he is certainly not a New Yorker. How do I know when it's real, or will it ever be real enough to take my mind off of that dream? The dream I have had since I was a child.
You do not choose the one you love.
You can't select based on a criteria you dream up.
I thought I could find someone to fit that mold, and I thought that person would suit me perfectly.
I was wrong. In fact, that is the least likely guy to get my heart. It always has been.
Take my first love for example...he was a different race and religeon. I fell in love with the person he was and the way he made me feel. We had fun together.
Years passed, we began to argue and then it was over. Nothing major ever took place to break us up, it was just a gradual desintegration that took place over us growing up and growing apart. Another high school sweetheart sob story.
My second love was a college romance. He had a mental illness that drew us apart. He had a low self esteem and was never happy. He filled my world with romance, and swept me off my feet with his charm but inside him he was fighting a war that I could not help him win.
He gave up on us. He came up with an excuse to leave, which is what he needed the whole time. He could not handle our relationship.
I recently met someone, at a bar. The single place I swore I would never "take home" anyone from. He smokes, a habit I can't stand. He has a child.
Something that pains me deep inside because I know if we were to be together that our children would never equal the pleasure one has from their first born.
He has a ton of tattoos which are a turn off to me, he has no education which annoys me, he has a messed up family which hurts me, and yet, I feel something for him.
Why? He does not fit my mold!!! My prince charming has an education, has no baggage, and has never lived a real and honest life. The truth is that the picture I had of my prince does not exist!!!!
It is unrealistic to think that someone could live up to those standards in this day in age. If he does exist he is certainly not a New Yorker. How do I know when it's real, or will it ever be real enough to take my mind off of that dream? The dream I have had since I was a child.
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