In the Court Of Law

[RoadRunner]

Defense Attorney: What is your age?

Little old Woman: I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to
you on the first of April of this year?

Little old Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front
porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on
the porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney: Did you know him?

Little old Woman: No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?

Little old Woman: He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?

Little old Woman: No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little old Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner
passed away some 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little old Woman: He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?

Little old Woman: No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little old Woman: Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive
and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little old Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down
and said to him..."Take me. young man...Take me!"

Defense Attorney: Did he take you?

Little old Woman: Hell, no. he just yelled, "April Fool!" ... And
that's when I shot the little bastard!

[IQ]

loool

[Nazanin]

[Rasputin]

Sometimes we need to remember WHAT the Rules of Life really are.

1. Never give yourself a haircut after three alcoholic beverages of
any kind.

2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move
and it should, use the WD-40. If it moves and it shouldn't, use the duct tape.

3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are
"I apologize" and "You are right."

4.. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

5. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to
eat crow while it's still warm.

6. The only really good advice that your mother ever gave you was:
"Go! You might meet somebody!"

7. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her - believe them.

8.. Learn to pick your battles. Ask yourself, "Will this matter one
year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?"

9. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

10. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another
chance!

11. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you.

12. Work is good, but it's not that important..

13. And finally; Be really nice to your friends and family. You never
know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.

[Nazanin]

Wow, that was very cool


Dame 4 & 7 kheili garm

[Rasputin]

Nazi .